Eight Ways To Say “NO” Without Saying It!

Did you know, kids who hear the word “No” all the time tend to misbehave more, end up arguing or just not listen to adults when they are spoken too.  Parents should try and save our “No” for a very important time when we want to protect our children from danger.  It is important that we find other ways to communicate “No” or even try saying yes once in a while.  There several ways to communicate “No” without always having to say it.
Here are five simple options you can try.

1. Try telling the child what they may do rather than what they may not do.
2. Try sticking with the facts rather than saying no and trying to explain yourself, just state the facts and leave off the “No”.
   When your child asked “Can I play outside now?” instead of saying “NO, we are eating in a few minutes,” say, “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.”
3. Try to describe the problem.  Quite often children ask for things when it is not convenient. Let them know there is a problem.
4. A good habit to get into is using verbal signals. Nonverbal signals like raising your eyebrow, putting up your hand in a “stop” gesture can communicate without having to say “No”
5. Most of the time when children are trying to communicate they whine. In such a situation avoid telling the child “Stop whining” or “it’s bad to whine”. Always encourage them to use simple words to communicate. This can be nicely done by telling them you cannot understand what they’re saying when whining, instead they can say it in a regular voice.
6. Most of the time when kids are wearing their shoes they make attempts to take them off. Instead of telling them not to take them off, let them know that we only take our shoes off when we’re at home. This may also apply for a toddler that has just started wearing shoes. It could also apply to a situation like climbing on top of the chair. You can start by explaining to them, chairs are for sitting down and we only stand on the floor.
7. Children can sometimes find themselves in dangerous situations like playing with fire or near a power socket. In this situation, “No” is not enough. Using strong adjectives with some sense of urgency would communicate more easily. This brings out a positive communication that is more effective to them.
8. Really try to find a way to say “Yes” to your child’s request.  Be clear there might have to be a condition or two or three, but your child will appreciate hearing a yes instead of a no.  We are also teaching them how to compromise and problem solve when we implement.

Try these few tips on ways not to use the word “No” and see the difference in your child’s behavior.  Just be patient, they will resist at first, but soon enough your children will come around.